We had a phone call from the adoption agency. It wasn’t great news, but it wasn’t bad news either I guess.
I’ll have to explain, we’re a bit different to other couples and things are a bit more difficult.
A few years ago, April 2010 to be precise, we had to collect some blood test results for Alice. Alice’s family has a troubled past with genetics and in particular, the BRCA2 gene. Recently the BRCA1 gene has been in the papers courtesy of Angelina Jolie and the preventative surgery she opted for.
Well, to cut a long story short, Alice has the BRCA2 gene. If you’re so inclined, you can read the wikipedia entry about it here. She’s going to have the surgery at some point in the future, but we’re not sure when they’ll be able to do it and understandably, the adoption people need to know when too.
I can understand that.
Also they want us to prove we’re not smoking so we’ve got to go to the doctors and get reports done. Fair enough.
Also our nice new house is well, basically too new… We need to have been in there for longer. Which is something that worries me in any case as our landlady is a bit flighty… We’ve got a tenancy review in December so I’m hoping we’ll be able to extend the tenancy for a while longer. Also we’re going to put ourselves on the council list so that if we can, we’ll be able to get something more stable.
They also want to speak to any significant previous partners. Which is not good news for me, needless to say the person I was with before Alice could hold quite the grudge. Hopefully they’ll take a statement from a mutual friend instead.
Oh and then there’s me having been a bit crazy in my early twenties. Nothing major, I was just a bit messed up and suffered from thinking the whole world was out to get me, when in reality it really isn’t. I think I had a hard time coming out and not living up to what I thought my parents expected of me. In reality they wanted me to be happy, it just took me a while to figure that out and basically stop being a brat.
It’s added an extra 5 months to the whole process which initially knocked me for six. I’m gutted as we were so excited thinking that we would have a new addition to the family within the space of a year, and now that has been extended again.
We’re so desperate to have a family and share our lives with another little one (or two) that it feels like its slipping away from us again. It’s not and it’ll all be worth it, but we started to let ourselves believe things were really happening and happening quickly too.
I broke down on the phone to the woman, which was awful. She explained that it isn’t a no, it isn’t even necessarily an issue, but there are things that we need to get in order before they can consider us.
So we’ve got some work to do now…
Bring it on, we can do it.
- Cancer Demystified: BRCA Testing (5newsonline.com)
- Independant – BRCA2 Case Study
- Positive Results: BRCA2 (brca2gether.wordpress.com)
- Adoption – and so it starts… (samandaliceroberts.wordpress.com)
- Taking baby steps… (samandaliceroberts.wordpress.com)